Learning to Walk

Monday, April 4, 2011

Earrings: secondhand, $3 from thrift store
Gingham shirt: Old Navy, $19
Blouse: Macy's, $15
Sweater: ModCloth, $17
Jeggings: gift from my mom
Boots: gift from my mom

These are not the most conventional outfit photos for me, but I swear there's a good reason for it. All will become clear in time.

On Friday/Saturday, I became inexplicably depressed, and nobody likes to dress up and take pictures in the front yard while depressed (which explains why I haven't done outfit posts in a few days). All a depressed person wants to do is lie somewhat uncomfortably on a couch in his/her pajamas, stewing about what a pathetic, talentless, smelly human being he/she is. This is all part of being depressed, in my experience, and it is no fun at all.

These depression spells seem to come along every three months or so. For the record, I know what it's like to be depressed in an "I'm suffering from depression" kind of way, and that is not what's going on for me with these bouts. Still, it's a destructive and difficult habit, and I keep trying to find ways to either solve the pattern or accept it, whichever is most right.

As a teenager, I was very aware that other girls my age were sometimes filled with self-doubt or self-loathing, maybe because of how they looked or how people treated them, and I remember being so grateful at the time that, for whatever reason, I wasn't afflicted with such issues. Actually, I thought I was pretty special because of it. Such flawed, flawed logic ... But anyway, turns out that I was just saving some of these confidence/personal criticism issues for adulthood. FUN! And now I have to deal with them.

I don't bring all of this up in an effort to get sympathy or encouragement via the internet; luckily, I have sufficient amounts of both from my real-life support system (have I ever told you that I have the best best friend and the best husband in all the land?). The part I really wanted to share is that, between reading some heavy-duty inspirational quotes and listening to some wise advice from my husband, I think the solution to this problem will be to find and follow a new passion (or four).

One really mild passion that I took some time with today: taking a walk. I looped my point-and-shoot camera around my right wrist and took pictures whilst walking, most of them very haphazard. I took that same not-really-trying approach to the above outfit pictures, actually. Here were my favorite shots from the day.


Maybe going for a walk around the neighborhood doesn't sound like a legit "passion," or at least not a worthwhile one, but whatevs. It makes me happy.

The other things I'm doing are:
1. learning to play chess (Craig and I are halfway through my first game ever)
2. getting back to my doula training (I was super wrapped-up in this about a year ago)
3. working on altered books (check it out -- I'm already getting started!)


Anyhoo, I think you can expect to see some documentation of these new hobbies, which will mean pictures that look a little different. Heads up.

And also: this is the fifth day of my Weeklong Remix with the gingham shirt. I've worn the shirt more days than I've documented it, but I figured I ought to share these pictures from today just to officially round out the five-day stretch.

Gingham Shirt Remix #5:

See also:
Gingham Shirt Remix #1
Gingham Shirt Remix #2
Gingham Shirt Remix #3
Gingham Shirt Remix #4

9 comments:

  1. This post was so amazingly honest. I loved it. Thanks for keeping it real on the internet

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  2. I want to see more of those altered books, please!

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  3. what a fabulous post. thanks for your honesty, and for keeping it real. your photos are beautiful! those walks are like a 2-for-1 hobby, with your camera involved...and i do love a 2-fer. :)
    keep your chin up.
    -brittney
    http://adayinlifetoo.blogspot.com

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  4. Yay for getting back to the doula thing. That excites me -- I loved all those posts you were doing last summer about it! I'm also intrigued by the altered books...I have always thought those were cool, but I'm not sure I could ever actually deconstruct a book. But I'm anxious to see what you come up with.

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  5. I love that you are finding your passion again. I think that is so important. My roommate asked me what I did that I "LOVE" and I couldn't tell her. So I'm on the same quest! I love all the mixing you did in your outfit! looks awesome!

    I'm having a giveaway at Cardigans and Cookie Dough

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  6. So, I've been thinking these past few days, huh, Skrush hasn't posted lately (yes, I think of bloggers as their blog title and not their name. Sorry.). And then I see that somehow I totally missed this post. I hope you are doing well and are finding your passion. I love your remixes, and hope you passionate about those because I love seeing them!

    North Meets South

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  7. Great post!
    I had a long bout of blahness earlier this year...the days when all I wore was yoga pants...the only thing that stopped me from living in them and staying at home was my fashion blog...I didn't want to dissapear from it, and I felt like I needed to keep getting dressed....so a few days a week I would...and eventually I got over my blahness.

    The real reason I wanted to comment was that I LOVE how your wore your tops...the bright blouse is amazing!

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  8. i loved your post, i loved your photos. and you have a beautiful header on your blog :)

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  9. I know what you mean - I was a perfectly happy teenager and thought I'd dodged that bullet, but yes, turns out I was saving it up for adulthood too. Kudos to you for your honesty.

    By the way (and this sounds remarkably frivolous now) but I nominated you for the Stylish Blogger Award. Part of the deal is having to link back!

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